An exceprt taken from Iain H. Murray's, D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones: The First Forty Years, 1899-1939 and D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones: The Fight of Faith, 1939-1981 (Carlisle, Pennsylvania: Banner of Truth Trust, 1982, 1990).
"Parallel with Lloyd-Jones' observance of the world around him, but ultimately more decisive, was the growing recognition which came to him of his own sinfulness. He began to recognise that sin was much more profound than such acts are commonly recognised as immoral: there is a wrongfulness in man's very desires. What the Apostle Paul calls 'the lusts of the mind' -- pride, jealousy, envy, malice, anger, bitterness --are all part of the very same disease. Even in the mind, his highest faculty, man has become a fool. As this fact slowly dawned on Lloyd-Jones at about the age of twenty-three, his estimate of his own life was changed. The very debates which he had so enjoyed on religious subjects he discovered to be nothing but evidence of his own depravity. Preaching in later years on the 'lusts of the mind,' he made one of his rare personal allusions when he declared: 'As I was preparing this sermon it filled me with a loathing and a hatred of myself. I look back and I think of the hours I have wasted in mere talk and argumentation. And it was all with one end only, simply to gain my point and to show how clever I was.'"
After reading these Words tonight I considered Psalm 86 from my daily reading:
Psa. 86:1 Incline Thine ear, O LORD, and answer me; For I am afflicted and needy.
Psa. 86:2 Do preserve my soul, for I am a godly man; O Thou my God, save Thy servant who trusts in Thee.
Psa. 86:3 Be gracious to me, O Lord, For to Thee I cry all day long.
Psa. 86:4 Make glad the soul of Thy servant, For to Thee, O Lord, I lift up my soul.
Psa. 86:5 For Thou, Lord, art good, and ready to forgive, And abundant in lovingkindness to all who call upon Thee.
Psa. 86:6 Give ear, O LORD, to my prayer; And give heed to the voice of my supplications!
Psa. 86:7 In the day of my trouble I shall call upon Thee, For Thou wilt answer me.
Psa. 86:8 There is no one like Thee among the gods, O Lord; Nor are there any works like Thine.
Psa. 86:9 All nations whom Thou hast made shall come and worship before Thee, O Lord; And they shall glorify Thy name.
Psa. 86:10 For Thou art great and doest wondrous deeds; Thou alone art God.
Psa. 86:11 Teach me Thy way, O LORD; I will walk in Thy truth; Unite my heart to fear Thy name.
Psa. 86:12 I will give thanks to Thee, O Lord my God, with all my heart, And will glorify Thy name forever.
Psa. 86:13 For Thy lovingkindness toward me is great, And Thou hast delivered my soul from the depths of Sheol.
Oh the shallowness of my heart! To argue that I am right for the SAKE of being right is both callous and utter vanity. Praise God for His love and kindness. "Lord, may I throw myself on your grace daily as I live this life."
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